Co-parenting after divorce can be challenging, Dr. Lisa Walker is committed to helping you put your children’s needs ahead of your own, so you can master successful co-parenting

What is Parent Coordination?

Parenting Coordination is a helpful process for parents who have decided to separate or divorce but who are committed to assuring their children's well-being.

The goal of parenting coordination is to facilitate parents working together to keep their children free from their conflicts.  Parenting coordination recognizes that while conflict is a normal part of divorce, how well parents manage that conflict affects both the immediate and long-term well being of their children.   A Parenting Coordinator (PC), is a specially trained professional who utilizes a problem-solving approach in high conflict divorce situations.  The Association of Family and Conciliation Courts (AFCC), an organization dedicated to the welfare of children in the midst of divorce has established guidelines for Parent Coordinators.  You can look at those guidelines by clicking on this link: Guidelines for Parent Coordination.

Regardless of how carefully lawyers may have crafted divorce settlements regarding child custody, conflict continues to create distress for many parents and their children beyond the divorce. Problems frequently arise over issues that may not be specifically addressed in the parenting plan. Common examples are vacation plans, medical decisions, curfews, relations with extended family, dating, etc.  The parenting plan may stipulate that parents must agree on certain aspects of their children’s lives and activities but seldom addresses how to deal with disagreements when they arise.  Working with the parent coordinator can help parents avoid going back to court and provide a safe setting for dispute resolution.

Parents often have many unresolved issues between them and have not yet gotten what we refer to as an “emotional divorce.”  Thus, when conflict erupts children are usually caught in the middle of these conflicts—and may themselves be a factor in preventing resolution.  While divorce is certainly going to be problematic for children and their parents, research and clinical observation confirm that children who are caught in the middle in high conflict divorces are at greater risk for emotional and behavioral problems, among them, anxiety, anger, depression, and diminished school performance.

Parenting Coordination benefits divorcing or divorced parents by:

• Assisting parents shift their roles from former spouses to co-parents.
• Educating parents about the impact of parental conflict on their child’s emotional   wellbeing.
• Helping parents identify their individual contribution to conflict while increasing impulse control.
• Teaching parents anger management, communication and conflict resolution skills, and children’s issues in divorce.
• Ensuring execution of the possession schedules specified in the temporary orders or divorce decree.
• Monitoring parenting time and modifying time-sharing arrangements as a means of reducing parental conflict.
• Working with parents in developing a detailed cooperative parenting plan for issues such as living arrangements, discipline, holidays, communication, etc.

Parenting Coordination benefits children by:

• Reducing the child’s symptoms of stress as parental conflict decreases.
• Diminishing the child’s sense of loyalty binds.
• Creating a more relaxed home atmosphere allowing the child to adjust more effectively.
• Teaching effective communication and conflict resolution skills as modeled by their parents.
• Increasing the likelihood of keeping two active parents in the child’s life.
• Ensuring the child’s safety through open parental communication.
• Enhancing the child’s confidence and self-esteem by creating an optimal environment for growth.
• Diminishing the likelihood of future relationship difficulties and divorce in the child’s future.
• Reducing the possibility of adolescent drug and alcohol problems, teenage pregnancy, school drop-out rates, and crime associated with children of divorce.